Standard Bank Re-brand to Very-Average-to-Useless Bank
Well Blow me down. I have just logged on to www.standardbank.co.za to do a little banking of my own and managed to catch a glimpse of my statement.
I used to be a big fan of internet banking. Hell- I have helped so many of my friends to get registered and up and running on the site 'just to make their live SO much easier' (Can you taste the sarcasm dripping off my bottom lip?) It's easy: You log on, put in your details, two passwords and press enter. From there, you can check you account balances, transfer money between your own accounts, do a number of EFT's, top up your airtime- the uses are endless. What I am learning, (apart from how naive I am) is that all of this wonderful convenience comes at a price. A whopping R200- a- month price tag in my case! I spend that amount monthly on electricity. It's a week's worth of groceries for me. It's damn near a full tank of petrol! So, imagine my distain when I find out that I am having to pay Crap-Bank TO DO MY OWN BANKING! Holy shit. I am so Mad. My poor Mum, she just had to endure my ten- minute vent- session because she was the only person that would have given a damn!
The thing that makes my head shake in disbelief, however, is the fact that as a young working professional, I am absolutely powerless to do anything about it. I rely heavily on this process to get my day-to-day admin done. It's not like I can't live without www.crapbank.co.za but it does make my life easier- something we are all striving for, are we not?
In my rage, I searched for 'Standard Bank' on Twitter. I now follow @StandardBankGrp and will harass them until I get answers. I found a link to the 'Standard Bank Blog' (comical) and left my colourful opinion on their 'comments' page. Funnily enough, a little message popped up when I pressed 'submit' that said "A Technician will audit your message before it will appear on our site"- A TECHNICIAN?! What the hell does a Crap-Bank technician have to do with this process?! The next thing to do is to find someone whose job it is to listen to me and voice my opinion there. As I have always said, it takes a really angry person to write a letter... I am going to write a letter.
I really am not sure how to change the fact that Crap-Bank is bleeding me dry of my hard earned money. One way is to voice my concerns to all of you so that you might be moved enough to take your business elsewhere. Even so, that will feel like a tickle on Crap-bank's face when I want it to feel like a double-handed bitch slap. Do I go back to times before banks where I get paid in coins and hide a bag full of money (Money Bags herself) under my mattress? How un-evolved. How backwards. How dumb.
I am not inspired. I am however motivated to get the hell out of Crap-Bank's reign of bankruptcy! Involved? Sure you are bitches...Involved in my own financial downfall. How inspiring is that?
I used to be a big fan of internet banking. Hell- I have helped so many of my friends to get registered and up and running on the site 'just to make their live SO much easier' (Can you taste the sarcasm dripping off my bottom lip?) It's easy: You log on, put in your details, two passwords and press enter. From there, you can check you account balances, transfer money between your own accounts, do a number of EFT's, top up your airtime- the uses are endless. What I am learning, (apart from how naive I am) is that all of this wonderful convenience comes at a price. A whopping R200- a- month price tag in my case! I spend that amount monthly on electricity. It's a week's worth of groceries for me. It's damn near a full tank of petrol! So, imagine my distain when I find out that I am having to pay Crap-Bank TO DO MY OWN BANKING! Holy shit. I am so Mad. My poor Mum, she just had to endure my ten- minute vent- session because she was the only person that would have given a damn!
The thing that makes my head shake in disbelief, however, is the fact that as a young working professional, I am absolutely powerless to do anything about it. I rely heavily on this process to get my day-to-day admin done. It's not like I can't live without www.crapbank.co.za but it does make my life easier- something we are all striving for, are we not?
In my rage, I searched for 'Standard Bank' on Twitter. I now follow @StandardBankGrp and will harass them until I get answers. I found a link to the 'Standard Bank Blog' (comical) and left my colourful opinion on their 'comments' page. Funnily enough, a little message popped up when I pressed 'submit' that said "A Technician will audit your message before it will appear on our site"- A TECHNICIAN?! What the hell does a Crap-Bank technician have to do with this process?! The next thing to do is to find someone whose job it is to listen to me and voice my opinion there. As I have always said, it takes a really angry person to write a letter... I am going to write a letter.
I really am not sure how to change the fact that Crap-Bank is bleeding me dry of my hard earned money. One way is to voice my concerns to all of you so that you might be moved enough to take your business elsewhere. Even so, that will feel like a tickle on Crap-bank's face when I want it to feel like a double-handed bitch slap. Do I go back to times before banks where I get paid in coins and hide a bag full of money (Money Bags herself) under my mattress? How un-evolved. How backwards. How dumb.
I am not inspired. I am however motivated to get the hell out of Crap-Bank's reign of bankruptcy! Involved? Sure you are bitches...Involved in my own financial downfall. How inspiring is that?
Mands, I'm sorry to say but all the banks are the same. You can discuss the costs with them and they will sometimes agree to lower them. We have a meeting with Absa - also a load of crock - to discuss this exact issue, amongst others, next week!
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